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Asserting yourself

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Sheep, Feb 18, 2019.

  1. Sheep

    Sheep Supporter

    Xerneas Egg
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    How bold are you? Can you assert your personality, or are you more of the withdrawn type? If put into a pressuring situation, would you be able to stand up for yourself?

    Sparked from some ongoing thoughts I've had recently. Sometimes my workplace can be really stressful and I feel walked over/spoken down to a specific supervisor (even though according to others, it's just the way she speaks and is not intentional). I've been told by friends to speak up and let it be known that her behavior can make me uncomfortable, but that is so much easier said than done. I really struggle with standing up for myself sometimes. What about you guys?
     
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  2. Wizard

    Wizard Do you feel it? The moon's power!

    Pansage
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    I'm typically shy and not super assertive, but I definitely can when be when needed, especially when I've been in leadership positions. When somebody isn't being treated right, I try my best to stand up for them, but don't often stand up for myself in similar situations.
     
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  3. Moonstruck-Mist

    HoverBoots
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    The I in my personality stands for Introverted. I'm very shy, and rarely ever do I speak. I do get in a lot of arguments where I assert my "dominance" over people, but rarely ever do I have to go that far. I prefer to remain quiet and sleep otherwise. I'm just naturally lazy and quiet. Too bad I can't keep it up for long.
     
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  4. Azazel

    Azazel Better count your blessings

    Diancie Egg
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    I can, but literally everyone in my life takes my setting boundaries and having standards as a big offense.
    So i'm just like :/
     
  5. Dawn

    Dawn La vie est drôle

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    I can assert myself if I need to, but I don't honestly feel the need to most of the time. I'm not really invested in most things in life, and I don't have anything to prove to anyone. I'm not going to care about things just because they think I should; my priorities in life are my own and I am generally fine with things otherwise as long as they don't inconvenience me.

    I prefer to keep myself to myself until people start encroaching upon that...at which point yes, I will very firmly stand up for myself. Life is too short for that kind of thing: if you don't put yourself first, nobody else is going to, and realistically speaking nobody cares about me. I am at best a distraction, and at worst a means to an end. But that doesn't mean I have to play along with that, and I won't if it interferes with what I want to do with my life. Most people see me as withdrawn because I don't feel need to assert myself at the expense of others. But that doesn't mean I won't if I'm pushed too far.
     
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  6. SyWry

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    I can very easily assert my personality when need be. However most of the time, I just keep to myself as I don't feel it appropriate to assert myself in the environment that I spend my time in. I'm also a very inward person so I don't do much talking and I buckle to the more assertive. However, if I feel like someone isn't acting appropriately for the environment or if it is my job to assert myself, I will not hesitate to put myself out there and do what needs to be done. I tend to be thick skinned so any sort of attack towards me I rarely deem as uncomfortable, but if an attack is done to others, I will step in and assert.
     
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  7. Azazel

    Azazel Better count your blessings

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    I need to start thinking like this too, because most of the people who don't want me to be assertive are just shitty tumblr users.
    I shouldn't care about what they think, and not stress myself out.
     
  8. Neb

    Neb Cosmog Enthusiast

    AZ
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    GS Ball ★★★★★Love Ball ★★★★★Poké Ball ★Potion ★Oran Berry ★★
    I’m not assertive in the slightest. If I’m in a disagreement with someone, I usually apologize my way out of it. A good chunk of the bullies at my school are aware of this, and they attack me knowing full well I won’t fight back. I’d much rather get an adult rather than giving them the reaction they want. With adulthood right around the corner, I should probably be less afraid to assert myself. Giving people the opportunity to run me over sounds much more dangerous in the real world.
     
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  9. RadEmpoleon

    RadEmpoleon certified EPIC Gamer™ (they/them)

    Bondo
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    I’m a very shy person. To most people, I’m quiet and reserved. Therefore I’m not really assertive but I can be if necessary.
     
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  10. Absolute Zero

    Absolute Zero The second seal

    Jeff
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    I am, and have been for most of my life, very similar to you in this. I have the confidence and the reasonable-ness to assert myself, but generally I don't feel like putting up a fight when stepping out of the way is easier, taking the path of least resistance. I did have one recent success with this though...

    I was talking with my parents and an older cousin about a plans in a major life change I'm going to be undertaking soon, and this older cousin was throwing advice my way (I've had an annoyance with this lately) like they were nerf darts. One after the next, "you gotta" "you gotta" "you need to" "you gotta" and eventually I put my hand down on the table and said "No. I don't gotta. Are you my mother? Are you my boss? Are you me? Then I don't gotta do anything you say. We're both adults, and you have no authority over me. You can give me advice, which I can accept or refuse, but you do not tell me what to do." This was met with a pause and a "well fine then" that came out as one syllable somehow, and then the first five minutes I've ever been able to hear myself think in her presence. It felt good, it felt real good, and I think most of the reason it worked is because it was unexpected with how often I do just keep my mouth shut and don't assert myself.
     
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