Corrupt a wish

Wish granted~! You can now read any language~ (That doesn't mean you can understand them tho...)

I wish I am Zalgo had better internet~

 

Granted. But all your devices run at the speed of a snail.

I wish for a thunderstorm.

 

Granted, but there is only lightning, so it just makes you uneasy, expecting thunder at any moment, but it never comes.

I wish that the next person would get two wishes.

 

Granted, but they don't have a second wish.

I wish all humans could get along.

 

Oh yes, all humans get along~
That's because they stripped the humans rights of the majority, so they're not really humans anymore, no~?

I wish I had scales for skin...

 

Wish granted, but they're unbearably itchy.

I wish the eels in Mario Galaxy were (much) less scary looking.

Also on an unrelated note:

Fine, I'll do it myself.

 

Your thrown in jail and don't ever get to see your wish come true.

I wish that endangered animals would return in great numbers.

 

They return but humans kill them again in a matter of hours

I wish that I wasn't deathly afraid of thunderstorms .