Disappearance

(Floating... floating...)

'Huh? W...where am I?'

(Gently... gently...)

'Might this be what they call... death?

(Softly... softly...)

'It doesn't... feel bad.'

(Come... to me.)

One sunny day in Johto, a girl disappeared.

.o0o.

Floating in a void, a girl slowly opened her eyes. Darkness, that void was filled with it. It was a place of emptiness, of nothingness. She closed her eyes. Maybe this was where people go if they disappear. Not that very many people did, anyway. Had she known that this was going to happen? Maybe she did. Going on a new adventure seemed too good to be true, didn't it? About a better world and a new journey. In the end, she didn't get to experience it.

'Yes,' she thought, 'of course it was time for someone to replace me. Someone new, someone better,'

She sighed.

'Someone who looks prettier than me. I bet nobody ever thought that blue hair was pretty. Heck, who likes it? 'It's not natural'? Look at me!' She scoffed.

She raised her hand and looked at it. She grasped the air and released.

'Such a shame... I wanted to see what the new world was like... I heard there were some new buldings built as well...' she chuckled bitterly. 'Guess I'm not going there. Not anywhere. This is it.'

She shut her eyes tight. She felt light, very light, and nothing could bother her anymore now that everything was gone. She felt so tired though, she wanted to sleep and not wake up again, she wanted to forget, most of all. Since she's now alone, she wanted to forget everything she has ever had. But her mind refused. Her precious memories floated into her head, and the more she tried to push them away, the more they came floating back.

She has nothing left but these memories. Without them, who would she be? What would she be? Would she still exist?

Dry laughter.

'I disappeared, do I still exist?'

Drops of water fall. Is it raining?

Not in a void of emptiness.

.o0o.

Something dripped from her cheeks. Funny, where did this warm stuff come from?

It took a while for her to figure it out.

'Oh, it came from my eyes. But what is it?'

Haven't you realized it yet?

'Oh... it's tears... but why?'

Accept it.

"...No, I'm too strong for this... aren't I, Silver?"

Yes... he had finally said it to her, and you couldn't have guessed how happy she was when he did.

'And now... it's all gone.'

She'd like to think it's all a dream, but she knew too well that this is reality.

She silently bids farewell to the good old days as she fell into a deep, deep slumber.

.o0o.

For how long has she been floating in that void, she doesn't know. She didn't feel a single thing. Not pain, not thirst, not hunger. She feels like she's lost that part of her humanity.

'Gee, what did I expect? I'm dead.'

She would prefer to say she disappeared, but disappeared means gone, and gone means dead.

She spread her arms wide, trying to feel something, anything, besides emptiness.

(She's starting to miss life.)

She felt herself slowly gliding down, and she is surprised at how grateful she is to have felt it.

Her feet touched solid ground, and suddenly, a strange, distorted scenery sprang up in front of her. Massive bodies of land here and there, all of them facing different ways. Water flowing to every direction except down. And facing her was a gigantic, dark and ghostly creature, who knows how many feet tall, so very large compared to her. She didn't know this creature. Not at all. But somehow she wasn't scared.

((Welcome, to the Distortion World.))

There was a glint of loneliness in its eyes. It was the same as her. Alone. But she knew, that was going to change very soon.

Kris smiled.

This is her new home.

*Re-posted at fanfiction.net on 17 April 2015

 

(So... you have met the same fate as 'her'...)

'...where is this...?'

(Don't fret... come to me... come, to 'us'...)

'...why am I here...?'

(Come... to a place where you will never be forgotten...)

'...have I... disappeared...?'

(Because here, only 'she' and 'I' exist.)

A girl who was 'forgotten' slowly faded away.

.o0o.

'...?'

She opened her eyes slowly. What surrounded her was blackness, emptiness, and an eerie silence.

'Where... am I?'

She was floating... in a void. She could only see herself in the thick darkness.

'Why am I here...?'

The last thing she could remember was having a cup of tea with her mother at home. What did she do after that... she couldn't remember.

'Wait... that was after I came home from the Indigo Plateau... after I became the Champion...'

Her memories became less fuzzy, and she started to remember a few more things. After she was crowned Champion, she felt her presence weakening, and soon enough she became almost invisible.

'By then... only a few people noticed me... Red and Green were the only ones who can see me clearly.'

Only her two best friends. Even though she was also a Champion.

'Right... after Red beat the League, I went and defeated Lance, and was dubbed 'Elite Champion'...'

She clasped her hands together.

'...is that why... is that why I was...?'

A bitter chuckle escaped her mouth.

'Even before that, my presence has been weak anyways.'

At the peak of her invisibility, she visited Mount Silver, and met Red and Green, her two best-no, only friends.

'Those two... I was always with them, wasn't I? Then why weren't they...'

The last thing she remembered was the sympathetic looks her two friends gave her.

.o0o.

She thought and thought, being able to do only that.

'...'

She became doubtful of her experiences.

'I also traveled and beat the Gyms... I beat Team Rocket along with Red... then why? Why wasn't I remembered?'

Now that she thinks about it, she despises that word.

(Because she never was.)

'I even beat the Elite Four...! ...even though I never beat Red...'

But they forgot. About her.

'So, in short... I've disappeared. No... I've died.'

It's harsh, a much harsher way to say it. But she swallows the bitterness without a complaint.

"Because in that world, 'I' no longer exist."

.o0o.

That statement rung in her ears for a very long time. Now that she's said it, everything feels much lighter now. She doesn't feel anything weighing her down, she felt like she could do anything she wanted.

'...not like there's much to do...'

She suddenly thinks of all the places she could have been, all the things she could have done, and she feels her eyes starting to sting.

Even though she wanted to forget. She wanted to let go. But she couldn't. Deep down, she didn't want to.

'Red... Green... what are you two up to right now? I wish I can join you... no, I don't want to join you... but...'

She wanted to throw away the world, because the world threw her away.

'Mother... I miss you, but I can't... I don't want to go home... but I do...'

But she couldn't. She didn't want to be empty. She doesn't want to be empty.

'Even in death, I still want to be remembered as 'me'...!'

Drops of water fall, each with its own storm and turmoil.

.o0o.

How long has it been since she's arrived here? She doesn't know. She doesn't bother thinking about it anymore.

She has accepted her fate.

She closed her eyes, and took a deep breath.

'Will I stay here forever?'

She raised her hand and stared at it for a while.

'You know... this isn't really a bad feeling. Kind of quiet, but I like peace.'

She didn't feel a thing. Not hunger, not thirst, not pain.

'Because I'm dead... huh.'

In that sense, she thinks she isn't human anymore.

(But she feels lonely. And in that sense, she is still human.)

"I'm still 'me'."

She is still 'her'.

And with that in mind, she starts to yearn for something unknown. She shuts her eyes, spreads her arms out, to try to feel something. And she does. She feels herself floating downwards, and she is grateful to find that she could still feel.

She hasn't numbed.

Her feet touched solid ground, and suddenly, a strange, distorted world appeared in front of her eyes. She stared in awe at the unruly scenery, bodies of land with vegetation on them, facing many different ways. Water flowed out in every direction. This... place, this world, was the very epitome of chaos. But she didn't feel intimidated.

For a world of chaos, things were strangely silent.

Out of the darkness, a gigantic, ghostly creature, towering above her.

She didn't know it. And she doesn't fear it.

What surprised her more was a girl, about her age, with tealish blue hair in pigtails, walking beside the creature.

'Someone... besides me?'

((Welcome, to the Distortion World.))

The girl smiled.

"Welcome... to our home."

She looked at them. Who were they? She didn't know. She didn't care.

But she trusts them.

The girl reached out her arm.

"I hope we can be friends."

She does, too.

'Red, Green, wherever you two are...'

(Please continue remembering me, even though I've disappeared.)

She shook the girl's hand, and was pulled into an embrace.

A comfortable embrace. A warm embrace.

A memorable embrace.

Leaf trusts them. The creature, and the girl. Red, and Green.

She trusts them all to remember her.

*Reposted at FFN on 1 June 2015