Love is a difficult thing to deal with at the best of times, and unfortunately not all relationships work out. Have you ever had a relationship turn sour, or experienced an unrequited love? How did you overcome your difficulties, and what advice would you give to someone in that situation?
Every one of my past romantic relationships has ended, though only one ended sourly. The good thing is I can still be friend with most of these people, but the bad thing is, I can still dream about being with them. Being happy in my own solitude only goes so far for me, and my current medicine I think will be to find a way to distract myself with someone else. The hard part is that I don't want to use anyone as distraction: I would want to form a strong and healthy relationship. There is no easy way out for me, and until then most of my daydreaming is about a married woman. Sigh. There really is no easy way out for me. But I'm keeping my eyes and ears open.
I used to get crushes quite often, but looking back, I have only truly been in love once, and it was very much unrequited. Unfortunately, I was as dense as a rock, so I thought there was hope unless she explicitly said no, and she was too polite to do that. I did end up confessing, and she said no in a way that I recognized as a maybe later. I did figure it out before the next time we met, but I still have some feelings for her, albeit more faded, to this day. As for advice, never give up, but know when to call it quits. There’s a subtle distinction. If you truly love them and they don’t love you, let them go. You can still love them, just don’t pursue them unless they come to you first.
I mean, there was this one guy who I’d known for years and years. We were friends albeit the fact that I’d moved twice during our friendship, and over time I found myself liking him because he was polite and attractive and just had this certain aesthetic about him (think aviator sunglasses and leather jackets). In those three or four years that we’d known each other he took me to festivals, paid for my food and would always give me pep talks when I was feeling uncertain and down. I thought all of these were sure signs until I confessed and realized he was just being polite. We don’t talk anymore and I don’t mind, but I remember being so crushed when he told me he just wanted to be friends. I think I listened to a lot of angsty Korean rap! It wasn’t meant to be so I guess I’m glad that it worked out. I just hope I’m a little more intuitive next time.
My advice would be to not get your hopes up even if you swear they like you back. I've had multiple instances where I could’ve sworn they reciprocated and it turned out they didn’t. The dissipointment was overwhelming, and I don’t want anyone to go through the same.
