Your biggest regret

Pushing myself beyond the human boundaries that are set before myself. I never really liked to think of myself as human, and because of this, I pushed myself to inhuman means. This resulted in a lot of pain, as well as my biggest regret.

 

Are we talking about things that happened to us, or things that we did that had unintended consequences?

 

Forming lazy work habits early on. I totally had the ability, that’s for sure, but I got bored and therefore didn’t try— now trying to fix it feels impossibly slow...

 

I suppose it'd be not seeking help with my health problems earlier in life. I had an opportunity when I was in College but I really did not want to talk about things, so I didn't. It was a stupid thing to do and I hate myself for that, even though I was acting primarily out of fear. I should have been honest and upfront and dealt with it all sooner...I might be better by now if I had. Of course, if it had gone the same way that it did when I DID seek help it could have cost me my education, so there is that.

That SHOULD be my biggest regret...but then I think about how traumatic it was when I did seek help, and I often regret that. It cost me four years of my life - three of those spent doing absolutely nothing but getting steadily more suicidal to the point that I was actually making plans for how and when I was going to end my life in 2015 - and even though it's been 2 years since I ended my association with those services I still struggle with panic attacks related to that time. It was not the kind of help that was right for me - it made me worse, not better - and at that point I couldn't do anything about it. I'm not sure if that's regret born from not acting sooner, or a regret all its own.

Maybe it'd just be easier to say that I regret not dealing with my health problems in a more rational fashion. Of course, this all stems back to when I was six and is years and YEARS of ingrained habit, but even so...

 

Existing.
If you think about it, everything that came form me happened because I existed. If I hadn't existed, the world would be different. And since I exist, the timeline in which I didn't exist is lost to us forever. You made that sacrifice for this jerk right here.
Before you come here with the pity parties, I'm technically right, aren't I? If I hadn't existed, I wouldn't have been sorted into a local school and become so closed-minded so early on. I wouldn't have annoyed so many people, nor would I have drained so much from them. They probably had a better life in the other timeline. But because I exist, nobody will know. And that curiosity of what lies in that other timeline is killing me. It doesn't matter what you say, I do actually want to see what a world in which I don't exist is like. Nothing world-changing, but the relationships between everyone I know would. And I'd like to see what it looks like.
And since I was Oliver and Jay's owners (they're birds), they did something in front of a 5-year-old. That's another thing I did very, very wrong.

 

I regret being so ignorant about the class swaps(basically, nearly everyone was in the same class with the same people for the past three years. This year, our classes got randomly reshuffled, so we're all with different people now.) this year. I heard people talking about it, and I thought it was fake. Turns out it wasn't fake, and I just so happened to be in a class with absolutely no friends whatsoever. I knew everyone's names, and that's pretty much it. I quickly developed a lot of anxiety because of this, and I felt lonely every school day(keep in mind I'm extremely introverted - the type of person who prefers to be alone.). If I have known more about this, I could have at least told the teachers that I wanted to be with my friend(s), and there could've been a slight chance that I would be in a class with people I actually know better. Now, I'm sad, lonely, and depressed.

I'm not going to go any further than that. I don't want this to look like some sort of vent.

 

I have too many regrets to count and not enough I want to discuss. My regrets outnumber the cells of my body, and every one of them is a cause for me to say "never again": and it is there that I find my motivation to be better. My words, my actions, my choices; everything that creates my past is filled with regret as a repulsive magnetism pushing me to be better.

If I had no regrets, that would indicate I perceive myself that I have always been perfect. I was not, am not, and will never be.

If I had no regrets, I would have learned nothing in my life because pain is the best teacher. I have learned much the hard way.

If I had no regrets, I would have no propulsion to escape these feelings of pain. I am now filled with the energy to move myself forward in the struggle to break free of my own gravity.

Yes, I have so many regrets. But these regrets are not a ball and chain, but are the engine of my life. I wouldn't be able to grow without them.

Spoiler: Wall of text for ChocoChicken

Are you telling me that you regret something not that you did on purpose or accident, but something that happened to you before you were even sentient? You didn't choose to exist: existing is something that happened to you because of outside forces. But okay, I'll play ball: I've visited one of the infinite universes in which you don't exist, and I must say: you're whining over nothing. I talked to the non-existent ChocoChicken in that universe and he said "My biggest regret is not existing. Everything that would have came from me never happened because I didn't exist. If I had existed, the world would be different. And since I don't exist, the timeline in which I do exist is lost to them forever. They made that sacrifice for this non-existing jerk right here." And he would never, ever know that in most of the infinite universes he was born in, his neighbor was not late to work that one fateful day when he otherwise lost his job, eventually started working as a political lobbyist and then eventually as a politician, joined his state legislature and became a swing vote in that state seceding from the union in 2007 on mostly-justified terms and launching a second American Civil War that eventually drew in outside world powers that led the planet to World War 3 and a quick nuclear armageddon in 2009. Prove me wrong: prove to me that your existing in this world did not prevent your neighbor from being late to work leading to the deaths of 6.5 billion people in nuclear hellfire. You can't disprove me on that. But you know what is possible? You have a classmate you're friendly with. Not besties, but you sometimes did group projects together. Without you being the only person to acknowledge him, he lost faith in humanity and became a school shooter in the universe you were never born, taking dozens with him. Without you, your parents would have had other kids, and boy are they rotten: they never kill anyone directly, but they raise absolute hell on a constant basis and generally make everyone miserable, and they do it proudly. Without you, I'm leaving home just a little bit earlier today and I'm going to get in a car accident while I'm driving, and my surgical stitches are going to tear out and I'm going to bleed out and die of an otherwise survivable crash because you weren't here to take up ten more minutes of my morning. You may well have prevented me from dying, your non-existing siblings from becoming thugs, a classmate from becoming a shooter, and stopped nuclear fallout. And as wonderful as you are for preventing all these tragedies so effortlessly you never even noticed that you were a hero...! None of it matters. You exist in this universe, not in that one. If your biggest regret is two other people conceiving you, then try to actually do something worth developing regrets over. Think about some awful things that you might have done or might do eventually, and try to make sure they don't happen in the future of this universe. Like the thing with Oliver and Jay, I suppose. That mysterious incident may well have been something to learn from and to hold as a regret. I don't know, it's between you and the 5-year-old kid, but it still sounds like something that you can prevent from ever happening again in this universe, the only one that matters.

 

I'm regretting an awful lot right now. I'm regretting being so lazy that I might fail a subject that will cause me to repeat.
I'm regretting spending all my time writing instead of working.
I'm regretting never being able to get anything nice for my boyfriend even though he gets me so many nice things.

I'm regretting not being able to be there for my best friend when she needs it.
I'm regretting being up at 2:00 in the morning regretting this.
I'm regretting being unable to stop bloody crying about this because all the stress I'm going through I've put on myself.
In other words I just used this to vent a little since at 2:00 in the morning I have no one to vent to. Thanks for listening.

 

I regret trying to make everything perfect to meet what people expect from me. For the past five years or so, I've been working hard to meet the expectations of others. I'd do my best at everything, whether it be academically or physically. I hated submitting works that were not up to my standards, which was at that point in time, perfect. I thought that when I worked hard and made everything perfect, even to the tiniest of details, I'd feel happy and be recognized by people for being a good student who is hardworking. But now, I feel like after trying to reach that level of being "perfect" for such a long time, I lost track of my health. This may be something that people call "burning yourself out" and I think that's what it actually is.

I don't know if it's because of pressure from my parents or if its because of pressure from my classmates. I studied in a school where everyone was always competitive when it came to grades. I thought that I had to be living up to the same standards that I kept on staying up late stressing myself out on whether or not my work was good enough to be submitted. I kept on changing so many things at the very last minute and looking back at them now, I hate myself for being that way. I raised up the bar for my works so much that right now, I don't really feel like doing anything productive anymore. I feel like all of the energy that I could've used for my entire life was already eaten up by my efforts regarding school work five years ago. I feel lazier than ever and I seriously want to solve it, but my brain just doesn't want to cooperate right now.

 

Even though I had no control of this at all, I regret not looking for some psychiatric help when I was a kid, because for some reason what I've got is more widely accepted in children even though it's a life-long issue. Maybe I would have been able to get help so I wouldn't have so much confusion and anxiety in social situations. Maybe I'd have been able to get the skills I need to actually find a job and start being more independent instead of feeling like I'm leeching off my parents. I mean, I know I can still get help now, but my family now lives in an area that is at least an hour away from where I'd be able to get any psychiatric help, and it would just be really hard to visit a counselor or something as often as I would need to, not to mention expensive.

 

this is gonna be a long one

to be honest?? i regret every single thing about last year. it was a rough year for me in general but how i did absolutely nothing to fix it made it so much worse. and looking back on it, i could have fixed nearly everything that happened but i chose not to. i chose not to because i was terrified, afraid of what could happen even though lying and putting on a smile that was nothing but a lie was far, far worse. at least in my mind, i ended up hurting so many people i love. i felt so guilty for things out of my control. and it hurts me to acknowledge that these feelings still rip away at me during my bad days.

but most of all?? i really regret changing myself last year to be someone i wasnt. i lied to myself constantly in order to give me some form of solstice, whether it was genuine or not. in a way, it was a slow and steady death sentence to my mental state and sure enough, i never felt any better when i was the fake me. the fake me came about in response to all the above, so just knowing i could have done something, anything to fix it and therefore avoid the darkest time in my life?? i really regret it all.

 

Trusting people. As much as it sounds stupid, it's true. I would trust people and they'd backstab me. My cousin told me something that is very serious and I went to the proper people about it. Turns out it was all false

 

I guess, my biggest regret is just being who I am: a lazy anxious procrastinator who doesn't do anything to feel better
I just spend my time doing nothing, every day, and I regret it,
There are so many things I want to do, but I just can't get my lazy self to work, and when I do I feel like what I did is a waste of time and I regret doing it instead of doing something successfully :C

 

Putting my ultra moon cartridge in my pocket then walking around somewhere, losing it. It had a shiny talonflame, so... crap.

 

I regret being flaky and letting people walk all over me.
I have this need to be liked and I can't stand people being angry with me, even though real friends should be able to resolve conflict.