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A more complex question

Discussion in 'The Lounge' started by Fable_PH, Feb 4, 2018.

  1. Fable_PH

    Fable_PH Pixels and Paints

    Sketch
    (Flygon)
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  2. Ryan

    Ryan dating ur girl

    dont touch
    (Mew Egg)
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    Charizardite X ★★★★
    This is easy.
    I call it an idiot snail and hurt its feelings. It stops following me - stops trying to kill me. It wants to play the long game. It wants me to suffer.
    It tries to bankrupt me and sabotage my businesses as revenge. It never works out, but it's a thorn in my side for many years to come.
    Eventually, the snail runs into financial trouble. Its business goes under. Its wife leaves it. I feel guilty for hurting its feelings. I bail it out and console the snail.
    We become friends.
    We start a new company together, and eventually marry and retire to Southeast Asia. We have a contactless but still fulfilling marriage. We adopt three children and return them weeks later. They were too noisy.
    We live happily ever after, forever.
     
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  3. Fable_PH

    Fable_PH Pixels and Paints

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    (Flygon)
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    Cool and good but....

    Decoy snail.
     
  4. Ryan

    Ryan dating ur girl

    dont touch
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    Charizardite X ★★★★
    I know who I fell in love with. It was no decoy. Your envy cannot destroy my relationship.
     
  5. Morgaine

    Morgaine Goddess of Shinies

    Bolero
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    Crown of ValorSoothe Bell ★Heart Scale ★★Ice Stone ★★★★
    Can I just put it in a jar?
     
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  6. Cadbberry

    Cadbberry Dad: 76.... Or Cad: 76

    Cosmo
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    Marshadium Z ★★★★★Love Ball ★★★★★GS Ball ★★★★★Mewnium Z  ★★★★★
    Cant I just throw a bag of salt at it, or drop a rock on it, or you can ya know just throw a ton of Raid on it
     
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  7. Tepig

    Tepig The Talking Tepig

    Fire Nation
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    Assault Vest ★★★★Flame Orb ★★★★★Black Glasses ★★★★Red Orb ★★★★★
    I'll attempt to barter with it. I'll grow a cabbage/lettuce garden for it and allow it to munch on it for all eternity as long as it never touches me. It will also have to pay 1,000 dollars per day if it wants to continue to live in my garden. After 1,000 days (by then I will get the entire million the snail had) I will allow it to live in my garden for free for the rest of eternity, no touching rule still standing. During this barter, I will wear a full bodysuit to make sure the snail does not betray me and kill me.

    Win-win. I get the snail's million, the snail will get an eternal supply of food. We'll both be better off.
     
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  8. Iopdev

    Iopdev Dragonair Enthusiast

    Ceto
    (Dragonair)
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    Legendary Triforce ★★Animal Crossing Leaf ★
    Does it kill just me or everybody it touches, cause if so i can just throw it at my enemies (While wearing gloves) and KILL THEMMM
     
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  9. Dawn

    Dawn La vie est drôle

    Cure Melody
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    Drop a brick on it. It's still just a snail, intelligent or not - it'll be too slow to evade that. Problem solved. Immortal or not, I'd like to see it moved buried.
     
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  10. Eclipse

    SkittleBox
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    Marshadium Z ★★★★★Dragon Fang ★★★★Luxury Ball ★★★Comet Shard ★★★★Mewnium Z  ★★★★★
    An immortal snail would be studied for science long before it would ever be able to reach me. Snails aren't exactly resourceful creatures - and besides, being immortal won't save it from being eaten either.
    However, I find the conversation efforts more likely, though not quite as hilarious. Besides, if the snail doesn't eat something, it won't last very long anyway, immortal or otherwise.
     
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  11. SyWry

    SyWry Rival

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    Go live in the international space station, or my own space station. The snail has no arms so there's no way he could get me up there even if he found a way on board.
     
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  12. Skittle

    Skittle idol boy enthusiast

    edgy emo child
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    Since I'm the most humane thing on this planet, I would get a cup and put it over the snail. Crisis averted! The snail doesn't die and I don'y have to feel bad!
     
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  13. Fable_PH

    Fable_PH Pixels and Paints

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    (Flygon)
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    Decoy snail
     
  14. Iopdev

    Iopdev Dragonair Enthusiast

    Ceto
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    Legendary Triforce ★★Animal Crossing Leaf ★
    I mean, just have it kill you after 100 years
    who would like to live 1000000 years
     
  15. BZRich64

    BZRich64 The Mustachioed Moderator

    Gray
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    Assuming that I can't come to some sort of arrangement with the snail, I would trap it in some sort of container and throw it into the Mariana Trench. The snail will endure an eternity of constant being crushed by the water pressure and unable to move. The snail will wish that it could die.
     
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  16. ophiespurr

    Randy
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    Going with the idea of somehow trapping it in a jar, I wouldn't nessecarily throw the snail into the ocean or anything, but I would keep it locked up in some kind of secure room, one that it can't escape from or hide in if it were to somehow get out of the jar. That way, I'd always have I'd have it...just in case.

    (We could also try to come to some sort of agreement if I can somehow learn how to communicate with it.)
     
  17. Fable_PH

    Fable_PH Pixels and Paints

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    (Flygon)
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    Now this begets the question- how does one communicate with a snail
     
  18. OzoneFruit

    OzoneFruit Ya Boi Goozma

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    (Litwick)
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    Lucky Punch ★★★★★Eject Button ★★★★Castelia Cone ★★★Leftovers ★★★★Luxury Ball ★★★
    First I locate the snail. Then I move to the opposite side of the world. I live comfortably. When the snail somehow crosses the ocean to me, I move back to a second house near the original location. Rinse and repeat. I also make sure to surround both houses with a nice ring of salt. Mwahahahahaha.
     
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  19. ophiespurr

    Randy
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    I use science to figure out how snails communicate with each other, then I attempt to replicate that method of communication somehow. Either that or I teach the snail human English.
     
  20. jeevan261001

    Postfestia
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    Tapunium Z ★★★★★Marshadium Z ★★★★★


    I am Wallace.

     
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