How do you express love?

Well, this is a fun topic. Kudos for the thought-provoking question.

The quick answer to this question is "I don't, usually" because there are very few people I could say that I really love. There are a few more people that I cherish and value highly, which is not quite the same thing, but close enough to it. In that case I try to spend time with them, find out how their lives are doing, and try and offer support and encouragement whenever possible.

When I actually care about someone, I express that by spending time with that person (and also wanting to spend said time that way). It shows that I want to be invested, and be some kind of help or assistance in the person's life. "I'm here because I care, and I want to help - just show me how and I'll do my best." That is generally the mentality I have towards those people.

For the people I actually love, it's the same as that but a few steps above, which generally means I do the things as mentioned above but with a higher intensity, showing that I really do not want to lose these people and will do anything in my power to keep them nearby. This is good for not only them, but also for myself, as I don't perform as well if I do not feel or perceive that my input or work is valued.

You could sum this up by saying that to show people I love or care about them, I'll want to spend time with them - and valuable time at that - to show that I care about their well-being and want to improve their lives or at least make them feel happy or smiling. And, on occasion, I'll throw in a tease or two as well; I have a whimsical sense of humour and I'll sometimes show affection for someone by gently teasing him or her (in such a way that it's very obvious I'm trying to be silly and not hurtful).

 

Usually I just spend time with them. Even if we don't talk or anything, just being near them is kind of my way of saying 'Hey I enjoy being around you". For people that are extremely close to me sometimes I'll go out of my way to do stuff for them like get them a coffee or a gift that reminds me of them to surprise them, or make them art. Just little things.

 

It depends on what their 'love language' is. It can be either gifts, quality time, physical affection, help (acts of service), or encouragement (words of affirmation). Everyone has all 5, but to varying degrees (though some can be wounded by past actions, such as a person who was raped would understandably desire physical affection the least).

 

I don't really, I'm bad at it because I never had friends or really loved ones to learn it with. It's sad, I wish I could be more warm.

 

I'm a little confused trying to figure this one out. If you don't mind me asking, what do you mean by 'warm' in that sentence?

 

Speaking in terms of the five love languages (i think there's five) i show love in the form of words of affirmation and spending time with my partner. (this is also how i prefer people to show love to me) I let my partner know I love them several times a day in some way or another, and making time for them is how I show I care.

 

It differs on the person, for my mom it's trying to spend what time I have with her when i can. Because she loved me unconditionally for so long and still does. Even when I know I was...cold and removed for a lot of it.

For my husband, it's trying to help, provide, be encouraging, listen, and enjoy each others company. Which on some days can be difficult for me, but I still try.

For friends, it;s dropping in to maybe like statuses, or say hi, text them, try to hang out when I can. Because if I consider you a friend, you were there for me when noone else was, or we just connected. This goes for IRL as well as online friends.

For pretty much anyone else, I'll listen to you and offer my advice, try to show I care.

My expression of love has changed as I've gotten older, and I'm sure it will continue to change.

 

I show people love by giving multiple options whenever I give them a poll.

In all seriousness though, I just wing it. Do what I feel is right for any given situation. That kind of stuff.

 

Like someone whos bright and nice? if that makes sense ;;

 

Ah, okay! That makes sense; thank you very much.

 

I shitpost on them and send them memes tbh??? Like, it sounds like a joke, but in reality that is 90% of my interactions with my brother, for example. Otherwise, just showing genuine interest is something I value greatly.

 

I think how each person expresses their love for another in their life is solely based on their personality, however somethings are universal. I generally like to spend time with those I love both family and otherwise. When it comes to things beyond family, I try to do a bit more. That bit more is where I differ. I am a very subtle personality and my actions reflect that. When I try to go beyond spending time, I usually do very small things or movements that could not be traced back to me. For example, leaving coffee for them or positioning my body in such of a way that it protects them from whatever may be coming, like an unsavory individual. Its hard to find good examples since often times they're so subtle that I don't even seen them as acts of love. But still, I'm very subtle and that reflects the way I show my love for others.

 

This question is very thought-provoking for me in the fact that I don't feel "love" due to my aromantic identity, but I still have a lot of experience with other kinds of love!

The love I know most is family love (especially with my sister), and I express that by just being with her and memeing around. I also do the same with my friends (platonic love means a lot to me too) but on a lower scale because I don't want anything I do to come off as romantic ;w; It's harder to show my friends how much I love them in a friend way because some of them might not know I don't pursue relationships, but I make it work somehow. All I really do is be myself because I'm somewhat of an open person and it's easy for people to get a read on me, if that makes any sense.

 

I have to wonder if I have a similar condition/trait to many other people, but it's hard to put into words. I suppose that when it comes to love, I don't have many levels between zero (huehuehue) and ten. Maybe like three stages total: acquaintance, good friend, and soul-bonded, and I suppose each gets their own expressions of love from me.

Acquaintances just don't get expressions of love because I don't love them. Easy. Good friends don't get verbal expression of love from me because that's just not how I function (as far as "love languages" goes for me, verbal expression is at the bottom). Rather, I express appreciation/friendship/likingness through proximity. Spending time together, whether for fun or for task, is my main method of that expression. The tricky part comes when it does come to verbal expression in that highest level of love I feel. It gets difficult to speak the love because of that previous thing: even at my highest levels of love, speaking the love is putting a square peg through a slightly-elastic-not-square-hole: it's not easy and not natural, but possible. The easiest way is by an upgrade of my previous step: proximity, time, and being together, but all of those moved up a few notches.

Hmm. Thanks for making this thread and thanks to everyone else who posted. This helped me define some parts of my psychology, and that's helpful.

Also, for the poll, is there an option D for all of the above? I feel like that should be an option.

 

If we talk about real life, I don't really express love. But if there is someone close to me and knows me properly they would know when I unintentionally end up expressing it in form of care or in form of teasing them. Welp, when I don't want person to know that I like or kind of love them, I tease or irritate as a method to do it...not the best one I must say but for hiding, it works with me.
Online it's pretty much another case. Since online we are not face to face and we can't see the person whom we are talking to, I am pretty open and express my love easily.

 

By being around people/talking to them a lot, I hope to express that I, at the very least, enjoy their presence.

 

i send a lot of memes

 

I have A. no idea B. No love for anyone